


As You Wish

by Leahelisabeth (fortheloveofcamelot)



Series: All for the Game Tumblr Prompts [10]
Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Demisexual Neil Josten, Love Confessions, M/M, Panic Attacks, The Princess Bride References
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-10-03 20:51:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20459285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fortheloveofcamelot/pseuds/Leahelisabeth
Summary: Andrew has a bad day and Neil helps.For a Tumblr prompt.  "I don’t want you, I need you"





	As You Wish

**Author's Note:**

  * For [CasTheButler](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CasTheButler/gifts).

It was good until it wasn’t. Touches that had been okay even two minutes before were now burning his skin and he could feel vomit rising up his throat.

“No. Stop,” he said breathlessly and the weight disappeared off his body.

Andrew opened his eyes. Neil had retreated as far as he could without actually leaving the room. He pressed himself against the door, entire body flushed, panting quickly, cock hard but softening from Andrew’s rejection.

“Shit,” Andrew said.

“Andrew,” Neil gasped, looking around for his clothes. “Do you need me to leave?”

Andrew shook his head. He dragged one shaking hand over his face, closing his eyes so he didn’t have to see disappointment on Neil’s face. By the time he had composed himself and opened his eyes again, Neil was dressed in sweatpants and one of Andrew’s t-shirts. He looked uncertain and Andrew hated himself for putting that look on his face.

“Did I do something wrong?” Neil asked, his voice breaking halfway through.

“No, you didn’t...it’s my fucked up brain.” Andrew hated how he sounded, weak, pitiful.

“Ok,” Neil said easily. “Just tell me what you need from me.”

“I don’t need anything from you,” Andrew said reflexively.

Neil chuckled. “I know.”

Neil had no fucking right to sound that soft. Andrew watched him. Neil flushed a darker red under his gaze. “You don’t have to stay over there,” he finally said.

Neil nodded. “I didn’t want to assume. Tell me what your boundaries are and I’ll respect them.”

Andrew cringed. They’d come so far and it felt like they were imploding, like he was falling down a deep dark hole to the moment he was hurt, to the moment he forgot how to trust a gentle touch. “Can you sit on the bed?” he asked. “I think a can put my head in your lap if I have a pillow. And you can touch my hair.”

“As you wish,” Neil smirked, climbing easily back into the bed.

“Ugh, why did Matt think it was a good idea to show you that movie?” Andrew grumbled.

Neil grinned. “Because he knew that you might not be comfortable with ‘I love you?’” 

Andrew’s breath caught in his throat at the thought of having the weight of Neil’s words directed at him for real. It was horrifying and wonderful and he wanted to throw up. He didn’t, couldn’t respond. Neil moved the pillow into his lap and waited for Andrew to shift. Neil took him at his word and touched only his hair, even avoiding touching his scalp. For a long moment, they stayed like that in silence.

“I’m sorry,” Andrew croaked.

“For what?” Neil kept up a slow steady rhythm in Andrew’s hair.

“For tonight. You wanted me and I couldn’t do it.” Andrew rolled slightly and buried his face in Neil’s stomach.

“Andrew, I don’t want you,” Neil said softly. “I need you.”

Andrew rolled back again to look up at him. “What the fuck does that mean?” 

Neil laughed. “You saved my life. You gave me a home and a family. I don’t care if you never give me an orgasm again so long as I can stay here.”

Andrew raised one eyebrow.

“It’s true,” Neil protested. “I lived just fine without sex before you came along and I’d be fine without it now. But I would not be fine without you.”

A gigantic lump formed in Andrew’s throat and he really hoped he wasn’t going to do something embarrassing like cry into Neil’s lap. “Who knew you were such a fucking romantic?” he asked when he could finally speak.

Neil shrugged. “Not me.”

Andrew laughed, surprising himself and he leaned up and captured Neil’s lips in a kiss. It wasn’t good, not yet. But maybe it would be.


End file.
